“That Just Means That” Pattern

The “that just mean that” pattern is a pace and lead pattern.

This pattern uses the phrase “that just mean that” to link two pacing statements to a leading statement containing our desired outcome.

The two pacing statements contain verifiable or self evident facts while the leading statement is what we want the other person to believe or do.

The two pacing statements condition the other person to accept the leading statement.

The pattern looks like this:

The “that just means that” pattern looks like this in operation:

The pattern looks like this:

Another example of the “that just means that” pattern in action:

The pattern looks like this:

Give it a try, and you’ll realize that anyone can have great powers of persuasion.

Awareness Patterns

Awareness Patterns uses words like:

     • Notice

     • See
     • Realize
     • Aware.

People tend to pre-suppose everything that follows these Awareness Pattern words to be true. Our attention is drawn to the part of the statement preceding the Awareness Pattern word, leaving the part after the Awareness Pattern unscrutinized.

Are you aware that people often assume that whatever is stated after the word “notice” is true, and therefore rarely question it?

Have you noticed how we seldom question what we were told when it comes after the word “see”?

Do you notice that anything prefixed by the word “realize” is usually taken to be the truth without question?
   

 
Do you realize that people automatically take what is stated after the word “aware” to be true?

Using the Awareness Pattern lets you bypass resistance.

Try it, because you will have fun.

Agreement Frame

The Agreement Frame is a linguistic pattern that enables us to elegantly disagree with and convince someone without breaking rapport.

The key words to use are “I agree” plus “and”.

The Agreement Frame pattern looks like this.

 
We start by stating “I agree”, then we state the other person’s model of the world i.e. perspective of the situation. Next we state “and”, followed by our own desired outcome, and end by stating the other person’s desired outcome.

The Agreement Frame avoids resistance from others, keeps others involved in what we are saying, and leaves them open to new ideas.

When we use the phrase “I agree”, the other person’s mind switches to a receptive state to hear how we agree with them. This receptive state also makes them more open to our suggestion.

Should we instead use the phrase “I disagree”, the other person’s mind instantly switches to a defensive state. Instead of listening to our suggestion, their minds will be pre-occupied with how to counter our proposal. Such a situation is hardly conducive to getting co-operation from others.

The secret of the Agreement Frame lies in the use of rapport. Using the Agreement Frame, we verbally pace the person we are communicating with, and then lead him to where we want the communication to go.

We illustrate the Agreement Frame in action with the following situation, something that often happens at the office.

In our example above, the subordinate’s response is likely to displease his supervisor.

The subordinate could have achieved his desired outcome elegantly - going home for the day - in such a way that his supervisor was more likely to feel agreeable, simply by wrapping an Agreement Frame around his disagreement as in the following example:

In this case, the subordinate had used the Agreement Frame. Let’s break down the language pattern of what the subordinate said:

The subordinate’s communication has the two key pacing elements – “I agree” plus “and”.

By agreeing with part of his supervisor’s communication, the subordinate begins to pace his supervisor by acknowledging her model of the world.

The subordinate then continues to pace his supervisor by using the “and” part of the agreement frame.

The “and” is followed by switching to leading the supervisor in the direction of his desired outcome i.e. to go home.

Finally, the frame ends with the subordinate repeating the supervisor’s desired outcome, which is to complete the work.

The Agreement Frame wraps neatly around any negative in such a way that overall the communication is received in a positive light, like a juicy hamburger.

Give it a try, because you will have fun.